By Mike Ptaszenski, CFP®, MBA
Money can be one of the biggest sources of tension in a relationship. Even when couples know it’s important to have financial conversations, it’s common to feel overwhelmed, uncertain, or even avoid the conversations altogether—until small disagreements turn into bigger problems.
To help prevent frustration and align your goals, we’ve compiled a list of the nine important financial conversations we recommend every couple make time for.
1. Assets and Liabilities
This might be a basic point of discussion, but it’s an important one. Before getting married, we recommend couples share the following with each other:
- Investments and other financial holdings
- Business interests
- Real estate holdings
- Loans, credit card balances, and other debts
This step is especially important for high-net-worth individuals because they tend to have complex asset structures.
2. Credit Histories and Scores
This is another of the most crucial financial conversations you can have with your partner. If one of you has poor credit (or even worse, if both do), buying a house or making other big purchases may be far more difficult.
That isn’t to say you should call off the marriage if your beloved has a less-than-desirable credit score. Instead, you can focus on credit repair before getting married rather than after.
3. Financial Priorities and Goals
We suggest couples verify they share the same short- and long-term financial goals. Planning for the future becomes much easier if you both agree on factors like retirement age, estate planning, wealth preservation, and philanthropy.
4. Spending and Saving Habits
When spouses have very different money mindsets, it can lead to ongoing friction in a marriage. For instance, if one spouse prioritizes saving and the other has a tendency to overspend, it may be extremely difficult to work toward shared financial goals.
I typically encourage clients to set a joint budget that allows each spouse to have a certain amount of discretionary spending money. It’s also wise to sit down for monthly financial conversations to check in.
5. Prenuptial or Postnuptial Agreements
This is one of the most famously controversial financial conversations a couple can have. Many couples skip this step because they can’t imagine ever splitting up. However, a prenup or postnup can shield personal and family wealth while streamlining asset division in the event of a divorce.
For clients who hesitate on prenups and postnups, I often suggest viewing them as planning tools, not as a sign of distrust.
6. Inheritance and Estate Planning
Estate planning financial conversations are especially significant if you and your spouse anticipate large inheritances. It’s always a good idea to discuss inheritance expectations sooner rather than later.
7. Tax Strategies and Implications
You may already have an individual tax strategy in place. However, marriage changes your taxes in a number of different ways:
- Your filing status is going to change.
- You may not qualify for deductions you previously claimed (and may qualify for new deductions as well).
- If you’re a high-income earner, you may need to develop a new tax-reduction strategy.
To avoid unwelcome surprises when tax season rolls around, you and your partner or spouse-to-be might consider discussing taxes with your financial advisory team. We can help you come up with a new strategy that suits your needs.
8. Business and Investment Management
When spouses own businesses, have significant investments, or both, I generally suggest appointing a financial advisor or “family CFO” to oversee their investments and safeguard their individual business interests.
9. Handling Financial Inequality
Wealth disparities can be hard on a marriage. If one partner has significantly more assets and income than the other, it’s wise to discuss fair contributions long before the marriage. It’s important for both partners to maintain their autonomy and avoid the power imbalance that can arise if one spouse becomes dependent on the other.
Reliable Guidance for Approaching Financial Conversations
At Thrive Wealth Management, our goal is to help every client bring the future they’re envisioning to life. We’re always here to help facilitate these difficult financial conversations to get you and your partner on the same page regarding money.
If you have questions about what we do or how we may be able to help you, contact us online today. To schedule a meeting, call (215) 376-5530 or email mike@thrivewealth.com.
Frequently Asked Questions
What are the most important financial conversations couples should have?
We recommend couples regularly discuss topics like assets and liabilities, credit histories, financial priorities and goals, spending and saving habits, estate planning, tax strategies, and handling financial inequality. Thrive Wealth Management helps clients navigate these conversations to prevent surprises, align goals, and strengthen financial partnerships.
How can couples approach difficult financial conversations without conflict?
Start by setting a calm, neutral time to talk, focusing on shared goals rather than blame. Using a joint budget, scheduling monthly check-ins, and involving a financial advisor can make discussions about spending, debt, and investments more productive and less stressful.
Why are financial conversations a good idea before marriage or major life decisions?
Discussing finances before marriage or major commitments helps both partners understand each other’s credit, debt, and long-term goals. Early financial conversations, including prenups or estate planning, can help prevent misunderstandings, shield wealth, and make future planning smoother.
About Mike
Mike Ptaszenski, CFP®, MBA, is a Co-Founder and Managing Partner at Thrive Wealth Management, LLC, a boutique financial planning firm in Audubon, Pennsylvania. Clients love working with him because of his genuine approach, built on trust and transparency, and the personalized attention he provides to help them feel confident about their financial future. For Mike, the most rewarding part of his work is seeing clients reach milestones they once thought were out of reach. He takes pride in simplifying complex choices and providing clarity, so clients feel confident moving forward. What motivates him each day is knowing that his work directly impacts clients’ quality of life and provides the peace of mind that comes from having a clear financial path.
Mike co-founded Thrive in 2013 after years in the financial services industry and has dedicated his career to helping individuals and families simplify complex financial decisions and enjoy lasting success. In addition to the CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER® designation, he holds a BSBA in Finance from the University of Pittsburgh and an MBA in Finance from Saint Joseph’s University. When he’s not working, he enjoys spending time with his wife and three daughters in Collegeville, PA, and staying active outdoors. To learn more about Mike, connect with him on LinkedIn.
Disclosure:
This material is provided for informational and educational purposes only, should not be viewed as an exhaustive discussion of the topics presented, and should not be construed as individualized advice for any reader’s personal circumstances. For guidance on how these matters may impact your financial plan or investment portfolio, please contact your Thrive Wealth Management, LLC representative. While the information presented is believed to be factual and up to date, Thrive Wealth Management, LLC does not guarantee its accuracy and, due to various factors, including but not limited to changing laws and regulations, this information is subject to change. All expressions of opinion reflect the judgment of the authors as of the date of publication.
Please visit https://thrivewealth.com/disclosure for additional information regarding the professional designations and credentials discussed. Professional designations and credentials do not guarantee success or any particular investment or financial outcome.
Past performance does not guarantee future results. All investing comes with risk, including risk of loss.
